preaching to the converted?

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Posted by Josephine Smith ( on June 24, 2000 at 23:06:22:

Hi, the question is *how Not To Do Harm*?

it seems simple, just don't hurt anyone!

But when you look into the question of what hurts someone it isn't so simple. Using empathy is a good starting point, but alas one can never actually know how another person feels.

When two people want different (or even the same....) things Often conflict looks like the only solution....a trial of strength or a sort of pass the parcel of unpleasentness.

And Buddhists often blame desire. Yet desire isn't the cause of the problem, the inability to look for ways in which both people can have what they want is.

I'm not talking about compromise either!

compromise means that neither person is truly content!

Instead of conflict it is possible to find a new solution that both people can prefer. This involves using creativity and imagination, and is actually preferable to conflict :-)

Otherwise someone is being caused to act contrary to his will.....which no one finds pleasent. And is infact *harmful*

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