Posted by SkySitter (18.104.22.168) on October 21, 2000 at 03:08:43:
In Reply to: Torn - what is best for my children posted by Dannielle on October 14, 2000 at 12:02:51:
: I would love to hear from other mothers whose spouse is not Buddhist. I am Buddhist, I say that and I feel that. My husband is very supporting, although, he may think that I border on the rim of crazy. I feel torn when it comes to my children. I di not grow up Buddhist, my parents always gave us the decision to make ourselves, even as young children. My parents we not particulary religious, my maternal grandmother was an over zelous Catholic, I found myself drawm to the Catholic mystisism, much as was the draw to Buddhism.
: I town does not have a temple nor a Buddhist community that I know of, beleive me I have searched. I am torn because I feel that my children are not exposed to "christianity" as I was as a child and at times, I feel that they are lacking that comrodery. My husband feels that we should go to church to expose our children, I say that I would have to agree. My choice to be Buddhist, was just that MY CHOICE. I feel however, that I am being hypocritical by attending a church were I do not beleive in the philosophy. I would love to hear other peoples opinions in this matter.
I think kid can see through us if we don't do things full-heartedly.
When my daughter come home from college, we reviewed "life in the past" together. SHe always teased me about things that we did ONLY I feel I "should" do for her (and not really enjoy doing it myself).
"Why do you have to waist your time and my time?"
The happier time is when we do things we both are really into it (or she really enjoyed).
I would say: take your children for things that you are willing to skip lunch for. Then, allocate time for things they are willing to skip lunch for.
Life is so short, don't just do things others think you should do. (If you don't know what you enjoy doing, sit and meditate first.)
(My wife is a Catholic-Buddhist. I am a Monk-want-to-be-but-didn't. My daughter is one doing-all-buddist-things-but-don't-want-to-call-herself-a-Buddhist, just like many of my friends.)
My 2 cents.
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